First Time

It’s the first time I saw you in tears.

Your face got as red as your lipstick.

Your hands were shaking so hard.

I was there, standing, watching.

It’s the first time I saw you so fragile.

You couldn’t stop your crying.

You didn’t care your feet were bleeding.

I was there, still standing.

It’s the first time I saw you hopeless.

You were calling for help, but no one came.

You were screaming so hard, but still no one.

I was there, heartbroken, seeing you like that.

I wish I could hug you close.

I wish I were alive, so you wouldn’t be so lonely.

I wish that time I wasn’t drive drunk.

I wish I could rewind things.

It’s the first time I saw you calling my first name.

It’s the first time I saw you holding my hands so tight.

It’s the first time you put my head in your lap.

It’s the first time you kissed me, in the lips.

It’s all the first time, and also the last time for me to hear

You saying “I love you”, over and over again

Before the death comes.

(a.s)

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